With the NFL season still months away, fans are Jonesing for anything football related to satiate the feels, so when Netflix released the Roast of Tom Brady on Sunday, fans were thrilled to get a bit of football to soothe those DTs.
So was it any good? Is it worth watching? Does TB12 cry? Let’s break some of it all down in our Tom Brady Roast Review.
Roasts
Anyone with a love of comedy will remember the notorious Friar’s Club Roasts that emerged out of a vaudeville era. As the Roasts grew in the 70s’, so was the appetite for celebrities to be roasted by famous comedians and other celebs to validate their ego in a slosh filled affair.
When comedian Jeffrey Ross pushed to reinvigorate the format in the early 2000s’, we were treated to some of the most outrageous and bawdy comedic lines in history. The Roasts of David Hasselhoff and Pamela Anderson had the likes of Greg Goraoldo, Lisa Lampanelli, and some of the harshest take downs in history.
Recently however, celebrities have been coy to attend given that any of their past deeds to could be brought up, and flashed in their face. To put it plainly, celebs today are too much of a pussy to take it.
Brady Steps Up
Is was good of Tom Brady to put himself up for this, even if it was probably his management to add a bit of humanity to him before his Fox gig.
Brady was a good sport about the various digs about his failed marriage, leaving a pregnant ex, and deflating balls. It seems that the only thing that really irked Tommy was when Jeff Ross made a masturbatory joke at the expense of Robert Kraft, which caused Tom to get out of his seat and remonstrate Ross with a quick ‘don’t do that shit again.’
Apparently there were boundaries.
The Niki Glaser Show
They might as well have given the whole roast to comedian Niki Glaser, who was most definitely the funniest person on the dais Sunday night. Anyone who says ‘women aren’t funny’ might want to see the master craft set that Niki blasted at Tom in a relentless fashion.
Cool, collected and with impeccable Swiss timing, Glaser was able to set the bar so high, that even Randy Moss seemed high when he followed her. Her shots at Gronk were so savage, it’s doubtful that he even got them.
Niki is one of the ‘old school’ roasters on the panel, and it was easy to see why she was the best, and so hard to follow.
Jew Bledsoe
Aside from the typical American race-bait jokes, it was interesting to see Drew Bledsoe toss a little antisemitism Julian Edleman’s way. Not only did Drew shade Edelman’s heritage, but also threw in a few ‘Jewy’ jokes about him haggling his own contract, and be able to switch from a nickel to a dime with added value.
Bledsoe extolled the virtues of winery and marriage, neither of which seemed to be in attendance that night as he was cast off to the side by himself.
Kim K
It wouldn’t be LA (or Englewood) without having a Kardashian at the Roast, as Kim represented her clan to a shower of boos from the home crowd.
Despite the assistance of numerous writers, Kardashian, like many non-comics struggled to get the belly laughs, and consistent ribbing.
Tom was able to lob a funny ‘Kanye’ fathering joke at Kim, which deflated any reason for her to be there.
Roasts are a good indicator of the ‘natural funny’ of a person, and Kim certainly doesn’t have it.
Where’s the Booze?
For a 3+ hour affair that is usually flushed with booze, most of the panel seemed to hold an empty glass for most of the evening.
Drew Bledsoe was wireless as he talked about being winless, Brady had 2 empty glasses on the go, and Kevin Hart seemed like he was smashed from the start, and got drunker and surlier as the night went on.
Although Bill Belichick was never shown drinking, he bounced around that microphone like he had a few. And when Brady hit him later with the dig about doing the dirty and getting caught on a Ring, well that was just hilarious.
All in all it was a fun roast, but along roast. Netflix will be hoping to smash more of these sports events down our throats to atone for those years of ‘wokrness’, but it will be interesting to see if anyone will have the stones to be able to take a good bashing.
Good on Tom Brady for taking it.