NFL in London

National Football League in London

NFL funny

March Meme-ness

by

March. In like a lion…how many freaking years will we be in lockdown?
With Covid fading off into the distance like Johnny Manziel’s career, it looks like we might be back to some degree of normalcy in NFL life.

March is the official start of the 2021 season, as teams need to begin figuring out who should stay, who should go, and who they have no money to pay.

The 2021 offseason brings with it plenty of opportunities for many teams, and many opportunities to continue to screw up their teams. (Looking at you Bears).
Chicago is so bad at drafting, they should switch ff beer to a pinot grigio and let the adults handle it.

Of course we kid, that’s pretty much all you can do in the offseason. So to help you with the shifts and giggles to start the new NFL season, here’s a selection of funny and silly memes to tickle your NFL funny bone.

We still have no idea what will happen with the London NFL games-but if we do hear anything, we will let you know.

Stay Safe and sane!

Super Prop Bets

by

The SuperBowl is only a few days away, which means it’s time to start thinking of some of the prop, or novelty bets on offer for this year. Sure, you can go the traditional route of betting on Gatorade colour, length of the anthem or whether Tony Romo is going to mention Robert Kraft’s favourite massage oil.

With so many oddities to bet on in this Super Bowl, why not contact your bookie and go hard? Why bet on the basic bitch package, when you can amp it up for Super Bowl 55.
These are some of our Super Prop Bets.

Trump Blows up Florida +165

Trump lost the election, the presidency and some would say the plot as he returned to his Florida retirement home to have Melania soak his boo-boos. Those who know Trump reckon he is seeking some sweet justice, and a public event like the Super Bowl is all he needs. Previous villains have tried to blow up the Super Bowl, but of anyone-Trump probably can pull it off.
If Trump blows it up before halftime, at least we will miss the Weeknd.

Tiffany Rivers Gives Birth +225

Phillip Rivers retired this year to focus on family, so it figures that his wife Tiffany is due to give birth again soon. Look for Tiffany to shoot baby number 23 across the field at halftime, with the umbilical cord firing over midfield as Phillip tosses a pass that snaps the cord, bringing baby and mama softly down on the field. Knowing PR though, he’ll throw the ball short and probably knock out the midwife.

Number of Covid Mentions +/- 300

Look for 300 to be the magic number threshold for mentions of Covid during the SuperBowl. 300 mentions in a 4 hour broadcast is actually reasonable, considering Covid was the star of the 2020 NFL season. Look for other parlays to add to Covid by adding words like ‘virus’, ‘lockdown’, or ‘Wuhan Flu.’
You could be in for even bigger bucks if a new variant emerges during the game itself.

Lamar Jackson takes a Halftime Dump +220

Look for doody-dropper Lamar Jackson to break up halftime by dropping the kids off at the pool, then mentioning it in social media. It could be something obscure, like calling someone a ‘wet-wipe’, or following ‘Charmin’. Everyone plays better when Lamar takes a dump, so look for shout-outs from his colleagues and friends encouraging Lamar to ‘go deep.’

Corona Admits it Caused the Virus  +340

After one of the nastiest trading years on record, Corona bravely fought off the initial link with their beer and a watery death. As the world transitioned from ‘Corona’ to ‘Covid’, the brewer deftly hired Snoop Dogg to help them ‘coolify’ their brand. Look for Corona to go all out on this one, not only boldly claiming that they started the virus, but they now have the only vaccine. This could be a bold brand move.

How many crappy new CBS sitcoms will be promoted? +225

+/- 4 . It’s been a tough year for TV, and CBS so look for them to throw down the gauntlet of fun (or faunt-let) as they go ‘all in’ on wacky sitcoms, promoting 4 new losers on Sunday. Fortunately all of the sitcoms will star Mayim Bialik and have something to do with cats, loneliness and an underlying current of sadness through the canned laughter. ‘What happens when a talking cat saves a suicidal middle-aged woman? It’s ‘Cat Got Your Back’, Tuesdays on CBS!’ The best bet is to wager on how long some of these shows last.
If we’re lucky, one of the sitcoms will be cancelled before the game is done.

Dwayne Haskins watches from a strip club +175

Dwayne Haskins loves his mama, and morally bereft strippers equally. While teammates in Washington bemoaned his lack of professionalism and misogyny, he always made sure to visit the ladies after every game he left early. Look for Haskins on social media to post something cryptic about ‘making it rain’, ‘love in the club’, or even using a weave as a mask. Don’t let us down Dwayne.

The Rock will be seen -250

Dwayne the Rock Johnson is the biggest movie star in the world, so it goes to reckon that he will be seen somehow during the Superbowl. The most obvious would be to show a trailer for one of his movies, but look for the Rock to do bigger.  Maybe an XFL ad, pulling Kevin Hart out of his pockets, or something to do with his eyebrows. Most likely? The Rock will actually be shooting a movie anyhow that somehow crosses over to the Super Bowl. Classic Johnson.

A Karen will be Shown -200

2020 was a hell of a year to be named ‘Karen’. You could have spent 50 years dedicating yourself to helping others, but if you’re named ‘Karen’, it doesn’t matter. 2020 owns you now.
Since the identification of the Karen, we have been all made painfully aware of how to spot the obnoxiousness. There might be only 20000 fans attending the game, but chances are there are a few Karen’s down there in FLA. Get your money ready.

Something Florida will Happen -300

The further you go into Florida, the more of a spiral of humanity you encounter. Laws of natural selection and decorum quickly go out the door. Florida Man Marries a Manatee. Florida woman Swallows 4lbs of Meth and Lives. Perhaps it is the proximity to the famed Bermuda Triangle that brings out the chaos, or maybe it’s inbreeding. Whatever it is, bet on Florida first.

What do you have as some of your prop bets? What kind of madness do you see playing out.
If you didn’t already know, we made these up. But if you can find a bookmaker willing to take this action, please do it!

 

Week 16 Preview

by

The NFL regular season is winding down while Santas’s sleigh approaches, as Wade & Ryan open their final advent window before Christmas in this Week 16 Preview podcast.

Week 15 brought with it some crazy upsets (looking at you Steelers & Jets), and it with changed the landscape of the NFL playoffs. Imagine if Pittsburgh loses all their remaining games and fails to make the finals? How 2020!

Week 16 has some great games over Christmas and Boxing Day, so make sure that you get your fantasy lineup set if you are fortunate to be in your playoffs. This is the finals for many leagues so good luck!

The guys make their score predictions for ALL of the games this week, so make sure that you listen to the whole thing to gleam all of the useless knowledge the boys have compiled over the season. Among some of the games the guys preview this week includes:

Vikings (6-8) vs Saints (10-4)
Saints -7  +52

Minnesota is almost out of the playoffs, and after a bad beat by the Bears last week, it’s hard to see how they can manage it. Their D is a shambles, and there is only so much weight you can shift to Dalvin Cook to carry the whole team.  Jefferson and Thielan are always a threat, if Cousins can find enough time in the pocket, which is rare under the heft of a strong D like New Orleans.
The Saints took a tough hit from the Chiefs last week, so they should be motivated to want to oust a division rival particularly the nasty Vikings.
It’s no secret that the Saints fans will be hating on the refs on Christmas Day, hoping that Santa will save them from previous naughty moves by the zebras in past years to rob them of playoff glory.
Wade & Ryan both think that the Saints will win, but that it might be closer than the Saints like.
Ryan- Saints 30 Vikings 24
Wade- Saints 27 Vikings 23

Dolphins (9-5) vs Raiders (7-7)
Dolphins -2.5  +47.5

Miami looks like they are on the way to the playoffs if they can win these next two games. It will be easier to beat the Raiders than it will the Bills. Tua and the guys had a nice win over the Patriots last week, albeit low scoring and not that exciting.
Where the Dolphins shine is on defence, so look for them to try to thwart the legs of Marcus Mariota at every angle.
Las Vegas is about to call it a season. It is highly unlikely that they will finish with a winning record, and effectively have to retire to the strip to find some action. They also won’t be that motivated to win, as they haven’t been playing with any vigour this season when needed.
Wade sees the Dolphins rolling through while Ryan has hopes for Las Vegas to roll the dice for a win.
Ryan- Raiders 24 Dolphins 20
Wade- Dolphins 28 Raiders 18

Colts (10-4) vs Steelers (11-3)
Steelers -2  +45.5

The Colts and Phillip Rivers continue to roll on thanks to the play of their O line and solid D. Rookie running back Taylor has been very useful, and should see plenty of field against the Steelers.
Indianapolis has been very weak in their 4 losses, and they have the look of a team that could be out in one game should they make it to the playoffs. This game will see how adaptable they are, and how much they prepared for this big game.
Three losses for Pittsburgh, logo dancing, Tik Toks, and the new car smell is gone. Pittsburgh not only lost 3 games in a row, but they lost them epically to bad teams. They could be the first 11-0 team that fails to make the playoffs if they lose all of their next games, so the pressure is on.
Wade & Ryan both like the Colts here, as the Steelers are still in a haze of focus.
Ryan- Colts 21 Steelers17
Wade- Colts 28 Steelers 26

That’s it for this Week 16 Preview podcast, thanks for listening and pushing it up the charts. Listen to the whole thing to get all of the score predictions & game insight. Continue to share, laugh and love, as we have a hoot of a time making it for you.

Draftkings League

Our NFL in London Draftkings League is also a fun way to get involved.
We have FREE & PAID contests every week, so click away and play with us. Hopefully once this is all over we can all get together again.
https://dkn.gs/r/kwxDR0JIokKPkA6cPjCtNA

Have a Merry Christmas, and stay safe this holiday season.

A Stiff Henry

by

If there has been one consistent joy this NFL season, it’s been watching players get ‘A Stiff Henry’ from the stellar Titans running back.
Fantasy owners of Henry have been constantly impressed by his tough and rough play, as well as  his ability to gash for countless yards after the touch.

Perhaps the most impressive thing about the runs Derek Henry has put together this season, is the reaction from his own teammates.
Watching the cringes, ‘oh no’s’, and resulting memes and gifs that result have been nothing short of pure, joyous entertainment.

Even his own cum-back kid Ryan Tannehill has been impressed by his running back, not for the least of the reasons being it takes the pressure off of his inconsistent play.

Check out Tannehill’s reaction to one of Henry’s killer runs in 2020, it’s safe to say he was blown away.

You know who else has been HUGELY impressed by Henry this season? Everyone who has had to face him in fantasy and watch him rack up massive points to put you out of the season.

Raider Rot

by

He does look a bit odd for a billionaire doesn’t he. Mark Davis is very humble about his looks, and is probably the funniest guy when it comes to cracking wise about his appearance.
You would think that a guy with that amount of money would be able to buy some sort of Face-Off thing where he could snip the looks of some kid who dies in a saw accident where his body is cut in half, but his young visage is still in tact.
Let’s be honest, the 1% probably engage in some sort of illuminati blood leeching rituals of virgins and child stars, but Davis doesn’t look like he fits the bill.
Once the Epstein flight logs come out, you can bet that Mark Davis’ name will not be on it. There’s only so many times you can hear a model scream ‘eww’ before you realise you need to change the guest list.
Kraft on the other hand probably has foody aliases to hide his nefariousness.
Oh to be rich.